Remembrance

Ok so I know that really this one is a little late in being posted but there is a reason. on this day, 46 years ago, my godfather was born. and i always take a moment to remember him. Because just 4 years ago, my godfather died serving out in Afghanistan along with 13 other brave men when their nimrod crashed just a few miles out of Kandahar. On the 2nd of September, my life changed and so did the families and friends of everyone who knew the crew, our community changed and since then, the defence plans have now changed. The RAF base that flew out these nimrods is being shut down, the nimrods job being seen as unnecessary when we have all the other equipment available to us in the defence sector. and it all comes down to government spending cuts.

on the 11th of every november we hold a 2minute silence for those who have fallen in wars, for those still fighting. we wear a poppy to remember those who we care about and to remember those that fought and still fight for change. We wear it out of respect and out of honour, because their job is so much harder and so much more risky than our 9-5 desk jobs.

I've heard people say "but thats what they signed up for, they knew the risks" and to an extent, yes, this is try, but that doesn't mean that the risk needs to be there, or that when the worst does happen, that a statement like that makes things any easier for those who have been bereaved. The nimrod my godfather was in, crashed, not out of being shot down or targeted, but through a technical fault that had made it un-airworthy, and with the inquiries that came out soon after, it would appear that for quite some time, this has been the case.

when i was little, i remember doing the 2 minute silences in primary school, we always did it, we always knew why but we didn't understand it, we didn't appreciate the real reason that we do so. so yeah, there would be the odd little giggle from somebody, there'd be the sideway glances to your friends. and then just a few years later when the accident happened, i sat in class and nobody laughed, nobody gived a sideways glance to their friend.
Maybe they had matured, maybe they had grown up, or maybe we'd all suddenly realised how close to home this all was. The 2 minute silence means something different to everyone. for some its at time for people to think of friends, colleagues or family. for some its a time where someone knows, that the majority of people, everywhere, are respecting those who have died - respecting the one that they have lost. For me its a time of reflection, and thinking about how i would have behaved if i hadnt known that he would have been taken so soon, a time for me to grieve in public and not be ashamed, because i'm proud of them, i'm proud of the entire crew and how they reacted from the moment the fire in the nimrod was located.

Perhaps what people dont understand, is that for those who have lost someone close to them, the 2 minute remembrance is timeless, because at least at one point, each and everyday, we are forced to remember and face the grieving process, face the sinking in the heart everytime we remember that they aren't coming home. having it as an 'official' day only gives us the reassurance that we aren't the only ones who respect the fallen.

For the first time since the accident, I was alone on remembrance day. I was in dundee, without my family. i was alone in the city centre with no one else around me i knew, and no one that knew my story. and i cried. I stood there alone and i let myself cry and i thought of my family and how i wish i could have been with them at that moment. but in a way, doing it alone made me just that little bit stronger, it gave me a belief in myself and in others that  when the shit hits the fan, we always remember and we always respect. and maybe thats one of the good things we should learn. that we're strong enough to make it through whatever life throws at us, as long as we can come together and show our support.

They shall not grow old, as we that are left grow old: age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning, we will remember them.


In Memory of:

FS Stephen Beattie
Sgt Gary Paul Quilliam
Flt Lt Steven Johnson
Flt Lt Leigh Anthony Mitchelmore
Flt Lt Gareth Rodney Nicholas
Flt Lt Allan James Squires
Flt Lt Steven Swarbrick
FS Gary Wayne Andrews
FS Gerard Martin Bell
FS Adrian Davies
Sgt Benjamin James Knight
Sgt John Joseph Langton
Cpl Oliver Simon Dicketts, Parachute Regiment
Mne Joseph David Windall, Royal Marines